I love how tough am I, by lying to myself.

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It has almost been a month. I didn't knew time pass so fast when I'm counting down and look forward to see you in uni (:

I still remember every word you said to me. I guess you do, because you still remember I told you I wont miss you when you're in Penang. In fact, I miss you most that time. I still remember how much both of us look forward to weekdays (although we hate classes ;p) during the weekends so that we could see each other.

I still remember you always text me in class and ask where am I because you couldn't see me elsewhere. And you purposely walked back from mamak alone just to meet me for that couple of minutes before you enters class. And I still remember the way you smile at me everyday at the main door when I'm walking towards.

Do you know how much it hurts the first time I want you to get out of my life? How much it hurts when ck told me everything? I thought I was tough enough to face it myself, until I was in the corridor crying alone after looking at your name.

Leaving you this time is not gonna be as hurtful as the first time. But why do you bother to hold me back whenever I want to give up? :(

afterall, I love how complicated it is. wtf